WATCHWORK

THE VERY BEST NIGHT OF YOUR LIFE No Joke. Without A Doubt. ...

Tue, 25 Oct 2011 09:47:31 -0700

THE VERY BEST NIGHT OF YOUR LIFE

No Joke. Without A Doubt. Veritably Guaranteed.

THAT JOYFUL NOISE

Tue, 25 Oct 2011 09:47:21 -0700

THAT JOYFUL NOISE

TWO DAYS IN THE BAY TOUR

Tue, 25 Oct 2011 09:47:14 -0700

TWO DAYS IN THE BAY TOUR

DEBUTANT BALL

Fri, 27 May 2011 17:04:13 -0700

DEBUTANT BALL

JOYFUL NOISE

Tue, 17 May 2011 09:32:14 -0700

JOYFUL NOISE

Photo

Thu, 19 Aug 2010 23:46:22 -0700

THE PETROL PEANUT BUTTER & JELLY PURVEYANCE FUND Thanks,...

Thu, 19 Aug 2010 23:32:56 -0700

THE PETROL PEANUT BUTTER & JELLY PURVEYANCE FUND

Thanks, all you wonderful folks that kept us fed!

BRENDAN MCCREARY & ANDREW FIGUEROA CHIANG

Mon, 07 Jun 2010 07:16:56 -0700

BRENDAN MCCREARY & ANDREW FIGUEROA CHIANG

TO THE WOMAN FROM THE HOME OF THE INTERNATIONAL DOUGHNUT COMPANY...

Wed, 02 Jun 2010 08:56:14 -0700

TO THE WOMAN FROM THE HOME OF THE INTERNATIONAL DOUGHNUT COMPANY FOUNDED BY VERNE WINCHELL ON OCTOBER EIGHT 1948

As is well known, unicorns, glitter, and the monome are totally mortal enemies. I am glad that you too wanted to resolve this traditionally undignified fight in a manner a bit more civilized-like: a contest!

COOL FACTOR
Glitter loses here – and badly. The monome does all right, but it is one of the nerdiest ways to make nerd music – not cool. Unicorns: yeah, cool
G- 0 / M- 5 / U-10

IMPOSSIBILITY
Unicorns are totally impossible.
G- 0 / M- 0 / U-10

SPEED
Unicorns – speed of mythical horses: fast
Monome – speed of sound: faster
Glitter – speed of light: superfast
G-1 0 / M- 5 / U-0

TALENT
Unicorns are totally impossible.
G- 0 / M- 0 / U-10

IMPORTANCE TO CHILDREN’S ART
Unfortunately, monomes are not at all important to children’s art. Unicorns, though a trope of children’s stories and a frequent contributor to the visual culture of the youth art word, have nothing on Glitter. Glitter is everywhere: glued on to make eyes glimmer in self portraits, add texture to free-form finger work, and make pastoral scenes glisten in the sunlight; it sits on the supply shelf of schools everywhere ready to be tossed, scattered, and sprinkled in the hair of unsuspecting classmates; it fills the very lip gloss applied far too early to lips too young. An endlessly flexible medium, a cornerstone of youth culture, and a disturbing style staple: advantage Glitter.
G- 10 / M- 0 / U-5

TOTALS
G- 20 / M-10 / U-35

It’s settled. Unicorns. You should definitely get one of those.

-WW

THE WAY LIGHT BREAKS

Mon, 31 May 2010 11:16:21 -0700

THE WAY LIGHT BREAKS

EMPTY WEIGHT Let this breath be not a waste, be not air and...

Fri, 28 May 2010 06:19:03 -0700

EMPTY WEIGHT

Let this breath be not a waste, be not air and empty weight.
Let this bed be more than this, one of love and simple warmth.
And these arms let them reach, hold, keep.
And this heart let it beat, skip, repeat.
And this soul let it still be moved.
If this be all.
Let this be all.

TO THE WOMAN FROM THE BIRTHPLACE AND CURRENT HOME OF THE...

Wed, 26 May 2010 08:51:31 -0700

TO THE WOMAN FROM THE BIRTHPLACE AND CURRENT HOME OF THE WOMEN’S WEAR WONDER FASHION 21

But really, what do turtles think about when they are inside their shell?

I suspect this: Fear - 50%, Food - 25%, Mating - 25%

But this is what I would think about: Fear - 50%, Mating - 50%

And this is the way that I wish I could actually answer that hypothetical: Contentedness - 95%; Naps, Hugs, Kisses, Brownies, Bourbon, Family, Friends, Love and stuff, Being a baby, Being a puppy, Being a baby puppy, Fresh snow, Summer rain, Rainbows, How buff I would be if I owned and used a bowflex - 5%.

What would you think about if you were a turtle hanging out in your turtle shell?

With fear and love,

-WW

PAIR

Mon, 24 May 2010 10:23:43 -0700

PAIR

GOES

Fri, 21 May 2010 23:12:36 -0700

GOES

TO THE WOMAN WHO ABIDES IN NEW YORK STATE BUT NOT THE...

Wed, 19 May 2010 07:11:20 -0700

TO THE WOMAN WHO ABIDES IN NEW YORK STATE BUT NOT THE CITY

Hey.

I promised you a letter about a year ago, but then I forgot how to write and walk and how to speak the English language and stuff. It was pretty scary. And it was probably going to be permanent, but then I saw this art-haus film called Billy Madison. Not a lot of people have heard of it. Don’t worry.

It’s kind of a parable, though. And in between poignant meditations on geriatric incontinence and the trials of kidulthood, I remembered that it’s never too late to go back and learn things that you should already know and have pool parties and participate in spelling bees officiated by ethically flexible elementary teachers.

Well I thought it would be important to mention that I miss you and that when I win the lottery next week the first thing that I will do is buy a ticket to New York State But Not The City so that we can talk about that summer when I shared an uncomfortable but very free futon with my brother and how I borrowed a dining table from you and never gave it back.

BE SAFE

Mon, 17 May 2010 06:20:36 -0700

BE SAFE

A BIT OF SOON

Fri, 14 May 2010 16:17:18 -0700

A BIT OF SOON

PAGE TWO TO MY HOMIE FROM THE HABRA Bazooka Bubblegum. Does...

Wed, 12 May 2010 15:36:00 -0700

PAGE TWO

TO MY HOMIE FROM THE HABRA

Bazooka Bubblegum.

Does it seem at all odd that such a benign and joyful chewing product would be so aggressively named? And do you think Bazooka, in conjunction with its similarly weapon-centric confectionary compatriots, (1) is complicit in a candy-based conspiracy to militarize youth everywhere sweets are sold. Are we going to survive the coming child uprising? Do you think a child-like spirit is enough to be spared? And whom do you think they will pick as a leader? Miley? Beiber? Milonakis? Anyway. I think my kids are going to eat Lifesavers. Or apples and stuff.

Mostly, though, I wanted to tell you about my mom and how much she loved gum as a kid and how because she came up poor she couldn’t afford to buy any. So she would pick and chew leftover treasure excavated from the bottom of restaurant tables, park benches, and school desk-chair combos. And she, despite unfamiliar fingerprints, stray splinters, and mismatched paint chips, kept chewing and smiling and feeling joyful. And she loved it so much that she would tell her kids this story and laugh and blush then say “Oh, gosh” and smile.

And for me this says a lot about love. And how when you love something sometimes you do things that are stupid and reckless and bad for you, but it doesn’t stop you because it is these things that make you laugh and blush then say “Oh, gosh” and smile.

(1) Atomic Fireballs, Warheads, Spearmint, Trident, etc.

TRIANGLE

Mon, 10 May 2010 08:30:48 -0700

TRIANGLE

DREW

Wed, 07 Apr 2010 01:46:07 -0700

DREW